How many times have you found yourself trying to make a decision with another person only to end up staring at each other and hoping one of you will just pick something? “Where do you want to go,” comes to mind. Often there is not one best alternative, but it can be frustrating to make a decision and move on. To address this, it can be helpful to have a fair process you can use. This can be as simple as a coin flip or even a quick round of rock, scissors, paper. There are members of my household who have some very strong feelings around games. It could be about who gets to go first, or who draws two cards. To simplify things, we roll dice or just take turns. The key has been to establish the rules before play begins.
In more complex situations, we can apply a similar approach. My wife and I have a rating system for when we need to choose between two activities or even competing approaches to something. We give our preferred option a score from 1 to 10 to help quantify how important that particular activity or approach is to us. When we share the number, it helps us better compare our options. We go with the highest number. What has made it work is that we trust each other to be 100% honest about the number we give. This simple method has really worked for us.
Give some thought to how you can better make those simple decisions that often leave you stuck. You could have fun with it and use a dart board, rotate on a schedule, or arm wrestle. I’ve found that the particular method isn’t as important as predetermining a method you will use to make the decision. The next time you are trying to decide where you want to eat, take a minute to figure out a fair process. Not only will it cut down on stress, but you might be surprised at how much time, energy, and even strong feelings you can save.